Question
Right after marrying my wife, we purchased a house to start a new life together. Having a mortgage loan was not easy, but we tried our best to pay back our mortgage by both us working full time. However, as time passed by, our everyday was just spent working, trying to pay back our debt and we were not living life as a newlywed. We eventually lost our sense of purpose about marriage, about work. How should I think to make my life more fulfilling and happy?
(Male 30’s)
A
Marriage is about coming together to support each other and enhancing each other’s strengths throughout life—it is to walk together at the same pace and in the same direction under any circumstances.
The first thing to do is to strive to create a loving peaceful family (home).
Learn and understand your role in the family and live.
The kokoro of the family will gradually come together and doubts will disappear.
Financial situation and the family environment will constantly change its forms. If you are finding financial difficulties, it is important that the husband and wife take the time to communicate their thoughts and be on same grounds about the current situation. Laying out the problems on the table will help see the problem more clearly and find the best solution. If the mortgage is too much, perhaps you have reached out too much beyond your financial limitation. Downsizing might be an option, but the size of the house should not come in your way in achieving what you want as a couple.