(HH from Iwate Prefecture/Teenager/Female/Middle School Student)
Even though I knew in my head that there are people with different views and ideas, there were things I just couldn’t do.
When I am talking to my friends at school, and when I don’t agree with what they are saying, I would rudely abrupt them and end the conversation. In addition, when my classmates said something rude, I would sharply retort, “Why do you say that!?” I thought I shouldn’t be doing this, but I don’t want to sincerely apologize either.
What I Heard at Minori no Tsudoi
My kokoro felt funny and uncomfortable. I wanted someone to listen to this feeling I had, and it was my father who came to mind. I live with my father. I love my father, but it took me a lot of courage to talk to him. Because I didn’t want him to worry about it. Also, I felt uncomfortable because I felt like I was saying bad things about my friends. But just as I was debating about it in my mind, the teachings I have been learning at Minori no Tsudoi crossed my mind. The teaching was; “Talk to your family about anything and get emotional support.”
When I ventured to talk to him, he said, “There was a time when I wanted to act strong too. And I couldn’t be honest with people. If you can’t do it, tell Kami about it.” I was glad that I was able to confide my feelings and that my father listened to me. And before I knew it, my kokoro felt much lighter.
Feeling Protected by Kami
One day, I offered kigan saying; “I want to talk to people about my honest feelings” and “I don’t want to do things to my friends that I don’t want them to do to me.” One day, a classmate who is good at math decided to teach me how to study. Then my classmate said to me; “You don’t even understand this? It’s clear if you read it…”
If it was me in the past, I would have said something right back. But this time, I was able to think in my head that I truly want to be calm, and I instantly said to my classmate; “You are right! It’s amazing that you can just read it and understand right away!” Then, my friend kindly taught me. I realized that if I can be calm, the other person will be calm too. I also truly felt that Kami has accepted my feelings.
What I’m working on right now with kigan is to convey my feelings to my father more. No matter how busy my father is, he makes bento boxes for me to take to school. I’ve never been told to buy lunch at a convenience store. I would like to convey more “thank you” and feelings of gratitude to my father. I would like to continue to grow my kokoro with Kami’s teachings.
From the Father
We are a single-parent home. If I didn’t know Kami’s teachings, I wouldn’t have known how to relate to my daughter. Never deny my daughter’s feelings, but accept them. Every day, I keep my focus on building a reassuring relationship with her, so that she knows her father understands. Teenagers usually stop talking to their fathers. But that is not the case in our household. In fact, there’s more conversations than ever before. I can feel the growth in my daughter’s kokoro, and it makes me think that I have to live well and strong. She gives me the push to straighten up. I will continue to go to Hikari no Yakata with her so her unmei will bloom to its potential, and live our life sustained by the teachings.
Heeding the Shinji to Understand the Reasons for the Joys Experienced
Shinji is the universal principle (truth), and can also be the guidance of life that foresees the future. Please feel the wonders of a life that flows exactly in a way the Shinji tell us when you live with the teachings of Kami.
Shinji
Deepen conversations as parents and children visit Kyōkai, learn the teachings together, and gain awareness of their respective roles and responsibilities inside the family environment.
Whether it is a tree without a root or a tree without a trunk; when you live by the teachings, your child will grow to be admirable.