(YA from Iwate Prefecture/Female/60s /Housewife)
I learned from Kami’s teachings that if your kokoro is unhealthy, it will attract disease. However, having worked as a nurse for many years, I thought from experience that this was not always the case. I believed that illness is caused by lifestyle habits and genetics.
Later on, I was diagnosed to having cervical cancer, and the doctor told me that surgical procedures were unlikely. At that moment, the thought that crossed my mind was; “This is my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law’s fault that I got cancer.”
Hatred and Resentment that Filled Inside Me
I was not in good terms with the two who have been living together with us since the beginning of my marriage. Even if I made an effort to reach a compromise, the rift will only deepen. My husband also tried to intervene and put a bridge between us, but the situation seemed to get worse, and I began to think that it would be better for both of us to stay away from each other.
“We lived together for about 30 years; and a lot of hardships is what made me sick.” Hatred and resentment were growing even stronger. Despite my thoughts, Kami gave me a helping hand.
Reflecting My Kokoro for the Very First Time
I was hospitalized for radiation treatment. As I was reading “Inochi no Ayumi” with enthusiasm and desperation, there was a thought-provoking Shinji that caught my attention.
You must know that the world can be joyous and happy or it can be sadness depending on how you hold your kokoro (p. 90 Inochi no Ayumi). It triggered me to wonder how my kokoro was right now, so I wrote it down. “I tend to blame people; I tend to talk behind people’s back; I tend to complain especially when I am overwhelmed.” What an unhealthy kokoro! It was not my mother-in-law or my sister-in-law’s fault that I got sick. I finally realized and understood that it was my own unhealthy “movement of my kokoro” that I had accumulated over the years was affecting my body.
“Kami gave me an awareness.” I thanked Kami in my kigan. And the moment I thanked Kami, the heavy load on my kokoro was removed and I felt much lighter—I felt a refreshing feeling and a slight warmth that was comforting to me. It was exactly as the Shinji showed us.
Even though it is unseen, Kami exists; and Kami is watching each and every person’s kokoro.
Interacting with a Completely Changed Kokoro
Overcoming cancer is not easy, but I truly felt that I want to live more with this family I have. When I felt this way, my feelings for my husband, my daughters, as well as my mother-in-law and sister-in-law, deepened. With kigan, I told them words of gratitude for the support I have received so far. They gave me a big smile. And that’s when I thought my thoughts reached them. I was delighted with this feeling. Now, whenever I come home from the hospital, I am greeted warmly and I am much more likely to be involved with them with a smile.
Thanks to this, I was able to accept my medical condition without anxiety, and the treatment is going well. My family’s words, “We will be by your side,” made me so happy that I cried, and I sincerely think that I can do my best because of them. My husband’s said, “You’ve become nicer lately,” was a great reward. It’s been 45 years since I became a shinja. I’m really glad I was able to gain an awareness at this point in life… I am grateful to be a shinja, and truly experiencing the existence of Kami.
Heeding the Shinji to Understand the Reasons for the Joys Experienced
Shinji is the universal principle (truth), and can also be the guidance of life that foresees the future. Please feel the wonders of a life that flows exactly in a way the Shinji tell us when you live with the teachings of Kami.
Shinji
Empty your kokoro; Put away your experiences and all the knowledge you have gained and learn the teachings of Kami.
You will start to see how life should be; pride and joy to be (truth) registered as a shinja will overflow from within.
Cherish the now as you learn Shinji—
The teachings will lead everyone’s kokoro (life) to one (era) without regrets.