(KS from Shizuoka Prefecture/ Female/60s /Housewife)
Seven years ago, I had a serious accident while driving. But my life was saved miraculously. However, the thought that went through my mind as I gained consciousness was; “Why didn’t I die?” instead of being grateful.
Indelible Grumbling and Dissatisfaction
My marital relationship with my husband was not going well at the time. My husband is selfish and stubborn—I hated that. But he took good care of me while I was in the hospital, and I was grateful for that. However, when life after being discharged from the hospital began, daily life was the same as prior to the accident. “I don’t even want to see your face; I want to divorce you if I can.” At that time, my daughter, who lives in Tokyo, gave birth to her third child. I thought it was a good excuse to get out of the house, so I decided to go and help my daughter. When I needed to go to the hospital for check-ups, I went back to Shizuoka. And when I was done, I went back to my daughter in Tokyo. This had been going on for several years.
Eventually, due to the pandemic, I had no choice but to return to Shizuoka. My daily life alone with my husband was filled with dissatisfaction. One morning, I said to my husband who never says anything; “You should initiate with a greeting!” My child told me to end the marriage. And so, I consulted with my sister thinking that would be the best solution. And this became my turning point.
Strange Changes Started to Happen
“Do you want a divorce or do you want to get along?” When asked, I answered, “If we can get along, I would like to do that, but I know I can’t.” This was my naked truth.
My sister gave me a little push saying; “If you want to change yourself, now is the time.” And I began to visit Hikari no Yakata, which I had rarely visited. I used to hope that my husband would change. But as I started reading the church books, I gradually began to kigan so that I would become a wife that my husband liked.
I was amazed myself. Then one morning, when I was vacuuming, my husband said, “Don’t put it on when I’m around.” Normally, I would be annoyed, but this time, I thought, “He probably doesn’t like loud noises first thing in the morning.” And so I said, “Oh, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
After that exchange, I started to think about what are some of the things that make my husband feel uncomfortable. And before I knew it, I was talking to him and making conversations even about small things like; “Can I use this?” And I was even initiating the greets myself. Why am I doing this? I was truly surprised.
When the Relationship Between the Husband and the Wife Changes, the Relationship Between Parents and Children Also Starts to…
When I started to change, my husband started to be nicer to me. Because of my handicapped with my hand, he took the initiative to go grocery shopping and buy my favorite cutlet. He would also say, “I made some oden (hot pot), so eat as much as you can eat” and share it with me. I was touched by a lot of his kindness. I can’t believe it’s changed so much!
Since then, a series of positive changes have occurred. I received a text message from my second son, who had been always difficult to reach. And we started to communicate again. In the year end, he said, “I caught a lot of fish,” and brought it to me in fillets. The eldest son and eldest daughter’s family members will invite us to eat and give us gifts such as photos of our grandchildren. My husband says “Thank you” to me more often than before. None of this has ever happened before.
These are all surprising changes to me. “I want to go see the Kawazu cherry blossoms with you next month.” While talking about such things with my husband, I feel an enormous sense of gratitude that I am glad that my life was saved and was given my life to live.
Heeding the Shinji to Understand the Reasons for the Joys Experienced
Shinji is the universal principle (truth), and can also be the guidance of life that foresees the future. Please feel the wonders of a life that flows exactly in a way the Shinji tell us when you live with the teachings of Kami.
Shinji
Learn the teachings and the more the teachings become the sustain of the kokoro and live, people’s kokoro will not have doubts.
People will naturally and gradually seek for a life led by unmei; and the kokoro to live with hōshi (to give back) will be drawn out.
The kokoro of hōshi (to give back) will bring the family’s kokoro together as one, and a true love will foster in the family environment.