I Have Been Going Out with a Man Who Has a Wife and Children, and I Cannot Break up with Him

I have been going out with a man who has a wife and children. Although I don’t mean to destroy his family, I can’t break up with him either. (Female in her 30s)

There are countless numbers of people with differences in society. We learn various things―both good and bad―through our relationships with many people. Therefore, unless we make each and every encounter correct, we will not be able to live a good life.

When you go off the path, you will end up hurting people around you, as well as your own life. Thus look for encounters that would elevate your life and lead you to happiness, rather than ones that would cast a shadow and lead you to leave behind bad elements in your life

Now that your relation has developed into one that goes off Hito no Michi (the path of righteousness), what you must do is to live with your heart supported by Kami’s teachings. Calm your mind, and change your mind even if it’s hard.

Shinji
Human beings will know the way one’s life should be through the encounters they have.
Therefore, what you need to have is the awareness that would lead to good encounters.
As marriage is an important juncture of your life―an encounter that would make the flow of your life develop, be someone who understands the correct path of the kokoro that would attract good encounters.

By learning the teachings every day, your will to live abiding by the path will steadily grow. You will surely be able to switch your mind to the direction where you can meet someone with whom your relationship will be fulfilled.

A relationship between a man and a woman has the potential to go beyond friendships. When they become closer, they will naturally come to think of creating a family together. Therefore, associating with someone who has a wife and children tends to lead you to go off Hito no Michi (the path of righteousness). With this in mind, what is necessary is to take care to avoid one-on-one relationships.