I Have Not Gotten Along Well with My Mother from My Childhood

Since elementary school days, I have not gotten along well with my mother, who I felt was always forcing her ideals on me about everything. Today, she always urges me to get married whenever we see each other, which I am very unhappy about.  (Female in her 20s)

A

Every parent wishes for their child’s happiness. However, forcing each other’s sense of values will not deepen the relations between the families. Sometimes misunderstandings and splits may occur. Therefore, now is the time to learn the teachings as a family and grasp the correct way of involvement based on each one’s place and role within the family.

Shinji
Today, numerous people egotistically live depending on their entrenched ideas, without deepening ties with their family members.
Understand your positions and roles well, and speak to your families of your thoughts.
The more this conviction deepens, the more you will come to see the love of your families, allowing you to experience meaning and purpose.

Please reflect on yourself and see whether you have been speaking to your mother of your honest feelings. The importance is to open up to your families from your own, and talk about anything with them. Rather than being repulsive, communicate calmly and cool-headedly with your own words what’s on your mind now and what kind life course you would like to choose. A parent will feel secured when they know and understand their children’s thoughts and feelings. They will stop nagging.

When you face your family seriously, you will be trusted by your parents. Then, how they treat you, their words and demeanors towards you will naturally change, where you may come to see your mother’s true feelings for you.

In a family where the teachings of Kami are abided by, the kokoro of family members will come together without fail. Experiencing a sense of security that the hearts of your families are connected each day is what Kami calls happiness. This is what all human beings should truly pursue.