(YS from Tokyo Pref./80s/Female/Housewife)
I thought my life is carefree, living comfortably on my own in my 80s. But then it all changed last summer when I got my vaccination for Covid-19. Symptoms from the side effects of the vaccine were very bad, and I started to stay inside my house more than before. I had a hard time getting up from bed, and bad thoughts started to come across my mind everyday thinking; “Is this how people end up experiencing a solitary death?”
Emotions Cannot Be Controlled!
My daughter who lives close by was a big emotional help during my dark moments. I can tell she really wanted me to live long so I knew I had to get out of my bad cycle of thoughts. To do something about it, I opened up a book from Kyōkai called ‘Kokoro no Seidō’ to look for some answers. And a phrase that said, “Direct the movement of your kokoro (*1) in the right direction” was an eye-opener for me. I felt so lazy about everything at the time. And without knowing, I was directing myself in the wrong direction. I realized and deeply understood that you cannot control your own kokoro.
That is when my daughter suggested me to consider going to a day care center. I am shy and an introvert at heart, so I wasn’t so sure about my daughter’s suggestion. But in the book of ‘Kokoro no Seidō,’ I read that no matter how much you age, there are things you can do to be useful, such as to give kind words to the people around you. And that gave me a push to be more active.
To Make Each Day Worth While
There were things I was able to do at the day care. For instance, I would tell the people I meet, “The art work you colored is fabulous!” or “Your skin looks so healthy,” and they would smile back at me. Their smile would make me smile and I would feel happy with these exchanges.
In looking back, I’ve always kept a teaching of Kami (*2) that says, ‘find people’s good points.’ And thanks to that teaching, I guess I have become very good at that. I would talk to those who would be by themselves, and conversations will grow. The staff members at the day care would tell me, “We are so glad you decided to join us.” I am so grateful for their thoughts too.
By the end of the day at day care, my cheeks hurt from laughing too much. I used to think that it’s better to be alone, but being active and involved with people keeps your kokoro positive, and helps keep your body healthy and up as well.
If it was before, my day would start with a gloomy feeling not knowing what to do that day. But today, I would get up and look forward to thoroughly study the teachings of Kami. I still live by myself, but I don’t feel lonely at all. I am confident that the teachings of Kami is directing my kokoro in the right direction.
Heeding the Shinji (*3) to Understand the Reasons for the Joys Experienced
Shinji
As you learn to deepen the understanding the teachings of Kami and walk your life, you will have encounters that will bring you many joys.
You will live with a positive kokoro, so your meetings with people and things will become moments that support your life.
Now is the time to live by the teachings and strive to become a person with a generous kokoro.
The more the teachings become the support of your kokoro, kokoro of human beings will anchor and will live a life led by their unmei.
This is when human being is experiencing true health.
*1 Kokoro: The thoughts and emotions that constantly move between the soul (unmei) and the physical body (jittai); if the kokoro is influenced by our temperament and other physical predispositions of our jittai, it becomes unbalanced; if it becomes one with our unmei, the kokoro becomes balanced and anchored.
*2 Kami: Great power above named Ōyamanezunomikoto; the source of all life.
*3 Shinji: The principles and teachings that are the word of Ōyamanezunomikoto and given to us through Shisha.