(TS from Shizuoka Prefecture/40s/Male/Dentist)
Nine years before, I was given a first child in our family line of doctor. How great my son will grow…. I was filled with hopes and dreams.
However, we found my son was a little different from other children as he grew older. His growth of learning in linguistics was slow, and he had a violent temper. In addition, he sometimes raised a queer. We really took care of him in all respects. We could not let him play with his friends since he sometimes struck them. My wife and I were really worried why our son was a bit unusual in every aspect compared to other children.
Salvation of the Kokoro Through the Strength to Be of Use to Society
Everyone was given unmei, the strength to be of use to the society from Kami. Our kokoro was really saved through the teachings. We were awakened that we might waste our son’s unmei if we conclude he cannot do anything. I felt I could have a mainstay in my kokoro when I learned that the future of children is influenced by the kokoro which is to become one as husband and wife.
I talked with my wife that our son will grow up to be a person who could give back love to surroundings if we give him a lot of love. I also told her that now is the time to save our love for him as parents. From then on, we praised him when he gained what he could do by himself. And we told every reason why we are upset when we scold him. Although my son seemed to find it difficult to understand the reason, our thoughts were surely delivered to him.
Most of all, we could find his good points. He lent his handkerchief when his friends cried, and he patted his friend’s head. The reason he took a violent behavior could have been from the stress that he could not come up with words to tell them. My son might have suffered and for not being able to show his gentleness which he originally had since we parents could not understand what he was frustrated and stressing about.
Aim to Make a Family Where a Good Seed Sprouts
My son entered elementary school and became a three-year pupil. Although his growth is slow than any other students, he moves forward each day. These days, he follows the rule which was decided between us about doing homework before playing the game. We are bracing ourselves not to betray him when we see his figure to try to meet our thoughts obediently.
I was raised in the family where a big emphasis was put on the educational background, and I lived a life as I cherished gaining the knowledge. However, I became a father and when we faced a difficulty we could not overcome by relying on knowledge, it was Kami who taught us what we really need to keep an eye on. During these nine years, I learned a lot of things from my son, and it made me grow. My life has no meaning without my son. From now on, I want to build a family with my wife where a good seed, an unmei given by Kami will sprout.
Heeding the Shinji(*1) to Understand the Reasons for the Joys Experienced
Shinji
It is important to strive to build a family abiding by the principles as husband and wife learn the teachings together.
Until the time of Kanhō, the parents have a responsibility to bring about their children’s unmei(*2) and hone it.
Place the teachings as the mainstay of the family education, and touch their children as their parents.
The core of the family education, is the figure to touch and tell their children the figure of the “Love that is the truth” as they become one with their kokoro(*3) (unmei) as husband and wife.
(Kanhō that Kami reveals us is unmei, the strength to live, and the ability given by Kami to every one of us. The age of fifteen is the turning point of coming into bloom with their Kanhō.)
*1 Shinji: Words from Ōyamanezunomikoto, the source of all life.
*2 Unmei: The unique strengths given to each human being at the time of birth by Ōyamanezunomikoto that allows us to be useful in society, to help others, and to live a life of hope, meaning, and purpose.
*3 Kokoro: The thoughts and emotions that constantly move between the soul (unmei) and the physical body (jittai); if the kokoro is influenced by our temperament and other physical predispositions of our jittai, it becomes unbalanced; if it becomes one with our unmei, the kokoro becomes balanced and anchored.