Question
I have been on a solo assignment which has kept me away from my wife and children. I have no complaints about the job I have, but cannot help but to worry about my wife taking care of three children all by herself. Should I consider getting a new job to be close with my family?
(Male 40’s)
A
There is a way to support each other despite the physical distance.
Employment is not about working to protect your livelihood.
All human beings experience life’s meaning and purpose by giving back to the world (society) when the strengths of their unmei are drawn out.
The work carried out at a company is giving back your strength (unmei) to an organization.
The work carried out within the family is giving back your strength (unmei) to your family members.
The kokoro to work materializes when the kokoro to live and give back is discerned according to time, place, and position.
Kami uses the term “hōshi”—which we translated as the heart to give back. What it means is to always use your abilities and goodness for the well-being of others.
If you are in a work setting, you have to be responsible to do your job for the organization you work for. At home, you are a husband and a father, so to support the family both spiritually and financially becomes important. Being responsible for the well-being of your family is your responsibility as a husband and a father.
We suggest you consider to communicate more with your wife before you take actions to quit your current job. Tell her you think about her, tell her how things are going with your work, and ask her to tell you more about the children. This is to show your wife that you are supporting 100% no matter the distance—the presence of you is always there with the family in a spiritual way. And this is extremely important. Moreover, the more the ties between you and your wife becomes stronger, the children will grow up to be honest and good. Perhaps making changes and few adjustments on how you can be involved with them from far away will give you a clearer picture of what you can do now to help your family. And we can assure you, your involvement with the family will help your work to be more successful.