(CS from Kyoto/Female/70s/Housewife)
My daughter and I have never truly understood each other and always ended up having fights for decades. When I divorced my husband, my daughter said to me, “I don’t think of you as my mother”, and it struck my heart very badly. This relationship with my daughter brought much frustration, and I blamed my husband for all that was happening. Perhaps I was just being the mother who’s always seeing the things that my daughter needed to change, and telling her to point out the wrong doings. I was determined that was the right thing to do, and never occurred to me that my daughter was feeling sad and lonely at heart.
At that time, I started to learn the teachings much deeper, which made me realize that I was the one that needed to change—I found myself not fulfilling my role in the family, and was not expressing my love to my daughter in the correct way. I thought I have to make changes, and that is when I started to ask Kami to help me be involved with my daughter in the right way to bring the distance closer between us. This process went on for 10 years…
When I fell ill, my daughter supported me, and I was able to tell her my appreciation. It brought us closer, and we opened up our hearts, and gradually fixed our relationship. Now, it gives me joy to do whatever I can to help my daughter who works incredibly hard. I tell her, “I am happier than ever,” and she in return tells me “those words make me happy.” Despite the conflicts we used to have, we’ve become a true mother and a daughter who can laugh and talk like true friends.