SK from Tochigi Prefecture/60s/Female/Housewife)
Last autumn, I received a sudden call from my daughter telling me her husband was about to undergo heart surgery, so I immediately made plans to visit her to help watch the grandchild. In fact, I had recently tested positive in a cancer screening and was scheduled for follow-up tests myself. As luck would have it, the day of my son-in-law’s surgery coincided with an important engagement for my second son. I decided to put my own medical tests on hold and leave my second son in the care of my husband and eldest son so I could rush to my daughter’s side. Then, on the eve of my departure, I received news late at night that my older brother had passed away. I knew he had been unwell, but I never imagined… I was so shocked that I couldn’t sleep a wink and greeted the morning in a daze.
“Leave it To Me”—These Words Gave Me Strength
The next day, after consulting with my sister-in-law and my younger sister, I decided to proceed with my planned trip to my daughter’s home in the Tohoku region. But what about my mourning clothes? What about the condolence money? And with my mother-in-law needing care, could my husband and eldest son really handle the preparations? As the time of my departure drew near, my already strained nerves felt ready to snap. Amidst my confusion, it was my husband—usually a man of few words—who told me, “Leave the rest to us.” True to his word, during the week I was away, he coordinated with our eldest son to see my brother off, attend to our second son’s needs, and care for my mother-in-law.
The Changes in My Heart that Emerged from Gratitude
When I was finally able to see my son-in-law, I felt such relief that I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. I was also struck by just how much I had come to rely on my husband and eldest son. I shuddered to think what might have happened had these events occurred on separate days; I would have certainly tried to handle everything myself, convinced that I have to do everything. That tendency—to shoulder everything alone—was a weakness of mine that I had long recognized but never managed to change. Yet, when I thanked them, saying, “It must have been so hard for you,” both my husband and my son simply brushed it off with a casual “Oh, it was nothing,” without a single word of complaint. They had put in so much effort, all while juggling their own jobs… With such a dependable family by my side, I felt a powerful resolve to finally change my lonely, self-reliant way of living.
Both my husband and my eldest son are men of few words. Even when they do speak, their remarks—such as “That’s fine” or “It’s too late for that now”—can seem blunt. Yet, when I took the time to reach out and wonder what was on their minds, I could feel their deep care for our family. I hadn’t been able to see into their hearts simply because I hadn’t made the effort to understand them. Bolstered by that warmth, I underwent a follow-up test for cancer, and the result was—miraculously—negative. I had one more test, this time under partial anesthesia, and that too came back negative. I can still picture the look of disbelief on the doctor’s face. “Mind and body are interconnected.” I have long studied this truth, and I found it to be absolutely real.
Live Each Day with a Relaxed Mind
In fact, until a few years ago, I used to work day and night without rest, driven by financial hardship. Looking back now, however, I wonder: what if I had simply turned to my husband back then and admitted, “I’m struggling”? He surely would have said, “I’ll work harder, so please don’t push yourself too hard.” Come to think of it, he has been that kind of gentle person ever since we first married. This recent experience allowed me to deeply feel the strength of our family bonds and brought us even closer together. Now that we say “please” and “thank you” to each other more often, life feels much lighter. I am truly grateful to Kami, who transforms even our hardships into a source of salvation.
Confirming the Workings of Happiness through Shinji
Shinji
Strive to make a family that interacts based on the teachings.
Gradually and naturally, the kokoro will anchor, and the feelings of gratitude will dissipate the doubts in your life.
What you must do is to understand the kokoro of hōshi and never neglect the kokoro to make the most of your encounters.
Your feelings will be positive and strong, and the thoughts to be involved with many people will start to deepen.
This is when human being achieve true health.
Shinji are teachings that set forth a way of life leading to happiness. Because they embody universal truths applicable to everyone, living in accordance with these teachings ensures that one’s life will take a turn for the better.