(RK from Fukushima Prefecture/50s/Male/Part-time)
After joining a major construction firm, I got married, and my wife and I were blessed with two children. However, we eventually drifted apart, and we divorced when our eldest son was three years old. Around the time I moved back in with my parents, I fell into a depression, which eventually progressed into schizophrenia. Unable to control my emotions and struggling to succeed in my career, I changed jobs several times. Yet, through it all, I never failed to continue paying child support. Even though I did not see them, I was driven by a steadfast resolve: “I must keep supporting them until they become working adults.”
About six or seven years ago, I took on a role as a caregiving assistant through a disability employment program. However, as I settled into the work, feelings of dissatisfaction began to surface there as well. I found myself wondering, “Why isn’t this working out?”
The Catalyst for a Turnaround Was Close at Hand
I loved Hikari no Yakata and the study sessions, and I had been attending them faithfully for a long time—yet my life remained at a standstill. However, the moment I decided to really understand the teachings, the true state of my own kokoro came into sharp focus, and I was struck by a sudden realization. By nature, I tend to be a negative thinker; whenever something goes wrong, I instinctively close myself off from others. At the same time, I harbored a sense that I was capable of handling much more sophisticated work than I was currently doing. How incredibly self-centered I had been. It was the very moment my heart—which had grown heavy and rigid—began to soften and loosen. Although I felt a bit embarrassed, I shared these feelings with my mother—for I had repeatedly learned the vital importance of conversations with the family. My mother, in turn, shared her own experiences with me, and—almost miraculously—my outlook became far more positive. Gradually, I found myself being swallowed up by negative emotions less and less often.
The Movement of My Kokoro that Brought About Changes
Positive changes began to take place in my workplace as well. It started with a resolve to devote myself wholeheartedly to the tasks assigned to me. As this mindset took root, I found myself increasingly taking the initiative to speak up—saying things like, “Please,” or “Thank you so much!” My interactions with colleagues deepened, and there were even times when, if I couldn’t finish a task within the allotted time, a colleague would step in and say, “I’ll take care of that for you.” A desire grew within me to be of service to the younger staff—to support them in whatever ways I could. My motivation soared, and before I knew it, the workplace had transformed into a truly comfortable and welcoming environment. Since learning at the church that one’s way of life is passed down to the descendants, I have become even more positive in my outlook. Gradually, my relationships with my younger brother—who lives far away—and with my aunt—who has always looked out for me—also began to change.
A Great Reward from Kami
Last year, my requirement for child support finally came to an end. I felt that, in some a small way, I had managed to fulfill my responsibilities. Then, this past May—just as I was breathing a sigh of relief—something entirely unexpected occurred. I was able to see my eldest son for the first time in twenty-five years. After speaking with my mother and my ex-wife’s parents, they helped arrange for us to reconnect. This was the very child I had once thought I would never see again in my lifetime. When he arrived with his wife and children—the four of them together as a family—my heart was simply overflowing with emotion. After we had talked for quite a while, we even promised to meet again. I truly believe it was the greatest reward Kami could have bestowed upon me. Later, when I showed the photos to my mother, she was absolutely delighted, exclaiming that my son looked just like me in my younger days, and that my grandchildren resembled other relatives. It was a truly irreplaceable time.
Currently, my schizophrenia is considered to be in remission. Under Kami’s protection, my kokoro has grown immensely. I hope that this experience may be of help to someone.
Confirming the Workings of Happiness Through Shinji
Shinji
The teachings show the kokoro you should have now.When in times of worries and troubles—this is when you should read Shinji with an honest feeling.
The more you read Shinji, the state of your kokoro will anchor, and you will start to realize and see what needs to be corrected.
The more you live by the teachings, human beings can live life with the movement of their kokoro that is in merge with their unmei.
Here is a kokoro of a person (human being) that experiences meaning and purpose in their life, and live a life filled with hopes and dreams.
Shinji shown by Kami set forth teachings on a way of life designed to lead to true happiness. Precisely because these teachings embody universal truths applicable to all humanity, if one lives in accordance with them, one’s life is bound to take a turn for the better.