(MN from Saga Prefecture/50s/Female/Part-timer)
My husband and I are famous for not getting along in our neighborhood. I married to my husband after a great romance, but we haven’t even exchanged greetings in the past 20 years.
The reason for our rift was how to raise our two daughters. My parents-in-law and I have different opinions. When I told my husband, he said, “I’m sorry,” but he gradually became angry. Our relationship grew cold, and before I knew it, my husband became silent no matter what I asked him, and he became uninvolved in our child’s education. I decided that my husband was ‘unreliable,’ and I became adamant that I had no choice but to do my best on my own.
When I Read Shinji Repeatedly Every Day…
“I can’t go on like this,” Thinking and taking action were two separate things. Amid all that, I consulted with Kyōmu sōdan (consultation) and confirmed the importance of accepting things favorably, rather than viewing them negatively. I said to myself, “If I read Shinji every day and look at my husband, I will definitely see something good in him.” I decided to put the Kyōkai staff’s words into practice.
The more you read Shinji, which are imbued with the power of Kami, the more calm your kokoro will become. That’s why I started seeing my true feelings. I used to think; “I’m always right,” “I’m doing my best,” “He made me suffer.” How arrogant was I? There was no way I could get along with my husband with this mindset. My husband must have had a difficult time between his parents and me. And even so, he worked hard for the family… I started to have feelings to at least prepare something he would enjoy for dinner.
Things Improve One After Another Because of a Change of My Kokoro
Soon after, my husband, who had remained silent no matter what I tried to say, began to talk back at me—answering my questions. Around that time, my young grandson, who was visiting, said he was going to sleep together with grandpa and grandma. I didn’t want to, but as I looked at my grandson’s sleeping face, I felt very blessed and happy. Then my husband said to me, “I’m glad I got together with you. I was able to meet my cute grandchildren.” For the first time in 20 years, I felt a sense of connection. I felt Kami’s deep love supporting me in my efforts to change.
From that night on, we both changed. I enjoy making my husband’s favorite meals, and I don’t mind waking up early to make bento boxes. When I am busy with work, my husband says, “Let’s just go out for dinner,” or “I’ll take out the garbage,” and other unthinkable things are happening one after another.
Returning to a Couple Like When We Were Newweds
This is the quality of my husband that I had forgotten for many years. My husband is actually a very kind person. Lately, he’s even said things like when we were newlyweds, “Thank you for always giving me delicious dinners and bento boxes.” We took a long detour, but I’m glad I was able to recall… I feel like I’m going back to when I was just so much in love with him.
“You guys talk a lot lately.” I was surprised to hear that our daughters’ families have started visiting frequently, and our home has become like a guesthouse these days. Neighbors also say, “You and your husband get along very well.” Strangely enough, the pain in my feet that I had had for many years has eased, and my work has become more enjoyable. Every day I am reminded of Kami’s teaching that the foundation of happiness is a harmonious family. Even if I am reborn, I want to meet my husband again and live happily ever after. I sincerely hope so now.
Finding the Principle Behind the Story from Shinji
Learn the teachings and make use of it with your kokoro.
The more you read Shinji, you will start to see the role and position of each family members.
Exchanging dialogues with a gentle kokoro and have the kokoro to care, your family will become an environment that enjoys conversations.
Wrapped in a generous kokoro, understand that the life of shinja (all) will achieve kaiun.
Shinji that Kami reveals are a teaching on how to live life in order to be happy. Because it is an unchanging principle that relates to all people, if you live according to the teachings, your life will definitely change for the better.