I cannot control my feelings when it comes to the things I want to buy. Recently I’m buying things without consulting my family, because I know they wouldn’t understand. I even go into debt when I do not have enough money to buy it with me. How could I suppress this desire? (40’s Male)
A
Being unable to control your feelings may be coming from an unstable condition of your mental state. In order to have your hearts and feelings anchored and stable, what is crucial is having conversations and interactions with your family. Your hearts will feel satisfied regardless of whether or not you can obtain things with form, when you live your life steadily for your family and feel needed and fulfilled.
Shinji ―Words from Kami(*1)―
The foundation of a life without regrets is a family in harmony.
In a family where the teachings of Kami are made use of, the kokoro(*2) of the family members come together, which will keep negative jittai(*3) from blossoming.
Greed is a part of what it means to be human. No one is completely free from greed. But to be able to recognize and control one’s greed means to be a self-reliant adult.
If you keep on seeking the attainment of things with form without getting approval from your family; if you act driven by your greed and emotions, you would not find your place in your home where it is needed the most ― your presence would not be shining ― and you might leave behind regrets in your life.
Realize your position and role in your family once again, and strive to get involved with your family positively. The more your heart comes together with your family’s hearts, you and your family can communicate your mutual thoughts in conversations such as the following; “I want this.” “Do you really need it?” Then you will be able to make good judgments cool-headedly.
(*1) Kami; Great power above named Ōyamanezunomikoto; the source of all life
(*2) kokoro; the thoughts and emotions that constantly move between the soul(unmei) and the physical body(jittai); if the kokoro is influenced by our temperament and other predispositions of our jittai, it becomes unbalanced; if it becomes one with our unmei, the kokoro becomes balanced and anchored
(*3) jittai; the positive and negative physical and emotional traits that we inherit from our parents and ancestors that are also passed down from us to our descendants; the movement of the kokoro according to these inherited traits.