I hate myself for always worrying about what people are thinking. I’m so worried about my parents, my boss, my friends, and even the store clerk that I can’t even say what I want to say. Lately, I’ve been getting headaches, what should I do? (Female in her 20s)
A
Caring and to be considerate for others is something that comes naturally if you have a loving heart that cares for the other person. If this becomes stressful, it may be due to a strong sense of self-protection, such as “I want to be seen well” or “If I don’t take care of this, I’ll be in trouble later.”
The place where genuine love is cultivated in the kokoro is the family environment. When children are loved by their parents, their feelings of love for others grow as well. First, face your parents with honesty.
Even if you find it difficult to talk to them at first, once you feel your parents’ love, you can feel at ease and express your feelings. Just relax and listen to your parents’ thoughts and return your gratitude by saying, “Thank you for always supporting me.” When you are shaken about something, open up your feelings and ask them for their support. And thank them for it. It is important to actively communicate with your parents about anything and try to connect with them emotionally.
Shinji
Strive to build a family environment where interaction is based on the teachings.
Naturally and gradually, kokoro will anchor and the thoughts of gratitude will eliminate the doubts in your life.
What you must do; is to know the kokoro of hōshi (to give back) and never neglect the kokoro to make the best of encounters.
Your feelings will be bright and strong; your thoughts to be interactive with people will deepen.
This is when human beings will achieve true health.
The closest human relationship we have is our family. By having lots of conversations with your parents and siblings, your relationship of mutual trust will become stronger. The experience of being made happy and appreciated gives you the courage and confidence to interact with many people. Be considerate of others and clearly convey your feelings. As we engage in these dialogues, our kokoro of love grows. Then, there will be no stress or burden in your kokoro, and you will always be calm. Your mind and body will be balanced and your body will become healthy.