We discovered our child has a developmental disability. I cannot accept our child’s diagnosis. (Female in her 30s)
A
Whether or not your child has a disability, your role and responsibilities as a parent do not change. As a parent, it is to enhance and extend their potentials—Carefully observe your child and compliment his/her strengths.
Shinji(*1)
Both parents and children will be swayed by the result when they seek out condition and form.
Thus their dreams and aspirations do not come true; they fall apart and hurt each other.
The kokoro(*2) of family will be fostered in the harmonious family where a husband and wife get along and talk anything with each other.
Create a family where they can free from keeping each members’ smiles and conversations lacking.
Kami teaches us that family in harmony is an irreplaceable place that protects the children. In order to create a harmonious family—talk anything as a husband and wife, make your kokoro one with your husband’s, and communicate with your child together looking at the same direction with him. As you compliment your child’s strengths that unfold over time, your child will feel he/she is loved, trusted, and anticipated. The experience will boost his/her confidence. In addition, as you discover your child’s new shining aspects and see that the confidence is growing in your child’s kokoro, your feeling of uncertainty will be gone; you will naturally be able to accept your child just as he/she is, including disabilities. There, both parents and children can live each day with stable kokoro.
*1 Shinji: Words from Ōyamanezunomikoto, the source of all life.
*2 Kokoro: The thoughts and emotions that constantly move between the soul (unmei) and the physical body (jittai); if the kokoro is influenced by our temperament and other physical predispositions of our jittai, it becomes unbalanced; if it becomes one with our unmei, the kokoro becomes balanced and anchored.