I can’t love my husband. I have closed my feelings for him since he cheated on me several years ago. In this family environment, our child has been badly suffering from allergies, which makes me very sad. (Female/ 40s)
A
Reflect on whether his affair was before or after you lost your feelings for him. And try to find out why you don’t like him and whether you can do anything about your dislike and solve it.
The kokoro of human beings is alive.
The more a family in harmony is created, the more vivid the human kokoro becomes.
In a home where each family member can speak of their thoughts and feelings, agony and suffering won’t remain even when their kokoro is in confusion or in trouble.
If you keep your kokoro shut, you won’t be able to solve your present situation. The wife has a role to accept and understand the husband, and connect the kokoro of the family members. Cheating is abhorrent. However, it’s necessary for you to think of the way he was feeling about you then.
The more you and your husband speak of your honest and sincere feelings toward each other, the more the suffering of your kokoro will flow away, which will motivate you to move forward positively. In order to live each day with a cheerful kokoro, now is the time for the husband and wife to face each other. Although an event that actually occurred is irrevocable, if you change the way you perceive things, you can change the meaning of these facts and things.
Disharmonious relationship between the husband and the wife is a part of the cause of your child’s allergic symptoms. When your home becomes a comfortable environment where the kokoro of the family finds peace, then the kokoro of your child will be stabilized, allowing him/her to live both mentally and physically healthy.