(SO Shizuoka Prefecture/50s Female/Funeral and Memorial Service Worker)
It has ten years since I had an operation for a breast cancer. I was just about to think that I will outgrow a medical check this year, when a liver and lung cancer was found. In addition, fluids in the lower part film of the heart were found and the doctor diagnosed and said that “I could not find the direction for this medical treatment.”
See the Kindness of Family Just in Front of My Eyes
I was totally despaired. “Although I cared my health more than other people…Why….” “I would rather die as it is.” My husband worried me who was shaken, and went to Kami no Yakata together. Then, syokuin advised us to learn the teachings as husband and wife.
My husband changed from that day. He desperately opened his eyes and read Kami’s book everyday as he fought sleep no matter how late he came home because of work. And he taught me “I could find the good phrase here.”
One day, he said “You cared your health very well.” Thanks to that one phrase, I felt my depressed kokoro became released at an instant. My son sent me an e-mail before and after the medical check, and he also postponed the scheduled moving. His care was greatly appreciated.
Urge to Want to Live of “I Want to Survive”
At the same time, I regretted greatly. Since I realized that I have not practiced the teachings at all even though I learned. I had no gratitude toward my family, and I only forced my feeling upon others demanding them to be a certain way I approved of.
My husband, my son, both of them were so gentle…. I could not realize this. The gratitude that was difficult to express rose and my kokoro felt that “I do not mind to die.” changed to “I definitely want to cure myself of cancers for my precious family.”
My Kokoro Changed Greatly Like it was New Me
I received the good news during proceeding of the medical check. That was I could have an anticancer drug treatment which I thought was impossible to do.
Since my hair will fall out when I start the treatment, my husband shaved my head by using hair chippers. My hair and kokoro became refreshed! I jump started on my new style with a wig.
I feel refreshed as I could not believe it is my kokoro and I feel that “Is this sense to be protected by Kami?” This change is thanks to Kami’s teachings and family. I want to overcome the cancer no matter what happens. I want to take a treatment with cheerful and positive kokoro from now on.