Question
Our son has started to live by himself since his entrance into university. We were surprised when the credit card bill of some large amount was sent to us suddenly. He had purchased expensive things such as brand-name clothes and tickets for pop stars’ concerts. We don’t know how to deal with his issue.
(Female 50’s)
A
Although university students are considered adults, lives of students living by themselves are prone to be in disarray. It must be kept in mind that parents need to continue to be involved in their behavior of acting responsibly.
A family comes to life when the kokoro of its members come together.
Converse with calmness and respect between the husband and the wife about how family should be.
The more the kokoro of the husband and the wife sympathize, the more their children’s love, respect and admiration for them will be fostered.
Anxieties and puzzlement that we come across in life from time to time, will not become a burden to families alive with conversations.
Reflect on the way your family had been until your son reached the age of 15. Were you involved with one another as the teachings of Kami shows? Now that it was found he has spent a large amount of money, it is crucial for the husband and the wife to come together by communicating thoughts with each other in accordance with the teachings. Based on this, face your son together as one. What is important is to listen carefully to what he has in mind, share the current situation of your household economy with him, and show him how much you love him. If necessary, you could also make some rules or place some restrictions on the ways he behaves by himself from now on so that he understands what it means to be a responsible adult. No matter how far he may live, as long as you keep your responsibility and your role as parents in mind and have a right involvement with him, you will be able to support him so that he may live with a sense of security and responsibility without being too controlling and at the same time giving him the space to grow.